Fantasy News 2022 : Preview Edition
Hello,
It’s me and I’m able to confirm I have not been cancelled - well I was nearly. However, I intend to run a commentary on this years antics but may be reliant on my regular snitches as I won’t always be able to play.
Luckily they are already in action and I have have a deep throat at the centre of the committee so am able to report on topics discussed, but not minuted. For example, they are always looking for new activities and they have decided to expand by launching a swimming club. 'Ash the Cash' will be in charge and has been secretly running auditions. I know he intends to appoint 'Henry VI' as captain after putting him through his paces on the 10th hole. It will be a new foray of royalty in sport, following Princess Anne and Zara Tindall. I think Ash intends to up entry fees to cover laundry and drying and the club has secretly purchased a hairdryer. Should last years. Further trials were held at Brentwood just before Christmas when 'Kiss me Hardy', 'Kevin Sandpit', and our own 'Wee Winesey' had to dive in to save Ash. Beware if you draw him in a competition as he is the common factor in these near drownings and has an ulterior motive as team selector. If you are drawn with him please bring your trunks, as nudity is not encouraged. We don’t want to excite the ladies. In fact Ash ordered the team kit recently for this latest venture. All the costumes turned up, but he was one swimming cap short. Luckily Winesey is on the team and already had one and, in fact, has been wearing it for several years.
Meantime, we have a few new members and I’ve been away so I don’t know who’s sensitive and whose Woke, but everything published goes through Flash, so what should I care. Welcome to you new and not so new members.,I’ve missed you and I hope you’ve missed me.
So to the competitions and the league itself. Everything starts at the end of February, so we are looking for more entries. We have 33, but target at least 60 to ensure a good contribution to charity and prizes worth having. My ‘able’ assistant 'Belly Flop' will be approaching you to enter before I get back. It’s easy - give him £10 and he will go away.
So far I have managed to play with Mike T - we’ve got two of then now - who I think said he used to be a 'Hair Hunter'. Don’t know why he’s joined us? Then there’s 'Terry All Day' (and All Night) and Triggers replacement - Mickey Pearce. Hope to get to know the other newbies soon.
Simon - Editor
Fat Boy Slim - Assistant and Trainee
PS. Followed the conversation re putting in cards. Seems to me a good compromise is Robbo does one, but the rest of you don’t!
PPS. Went to the Captains-drive In Lunch. Kim had cheesecake and then asked for custard. Takes all sorts.
PPS. Roger wrote to me asking the rules. I explained they are secretly hidden on the website under Fantasy League 2022 - how devious of me.
It’s me and I’m able to confirm I have not been cancelled - well I was nearly. However, I intend to run a commentary on this years antics but may be reliant on my regular snitches as I won’t always be able to play.
Luckily they are already in action and I have have a deep throat at the centre of the committee so am able to report on topics discussed, but not minuted. For example, they are always looking for new activities and they have decided to expand by launching a swimming club. 'Ash the Cash' will be in charge and has been secretly running auditions. I know he intends to appoint 'Henry VI' as captain after putting him through his paces on the 10th hole. It will be a new foray of royalty in sport, following Princess Anne and Zara Tindall. I think Ash intends to up entry fees to cover laundry and drying and the club has secretly purchased a hairdryer. Should last years. Further trials were held at Brentwood just before Christmas when 'Kiss me Hardy', 'Kevin Sandpit', and our own 'Wee Winesey' had to dive in to save Ash. Beware if you draw him in a competition as he is the common factor in these near drownings and has an ulterior motive as team selector. If you are drawn with him please bring your trunks, as nudity is not encouraged. We don’t want to excite the ladies. In fact Ash ordered the team kit recently for this latest venture. All the costumes turned up, but he was one swimming cap short. Luckily Winesey is on the team and already had one and, in fact, has been wearing it for several years.
Meantime, we have a few new members and I’ve been away so I don’t know who’s sensitive and whose Woke, but everything published goes through Flash, so what should I care. Welcome to you new and not so new members.,I’ve missed you and I hope you’ve missed me.
So to the competitions and the league itself. Everything starts at the end of February, so we are looking for more entries. We have 33, but target at least 60 to ensure a good contribution to charity and prizes worth having. My ‘able’ assistant 'Belly Flop' will be approaching you to enter before I get back. It’s easy - give him £10 and he will go away.
So far I have managed to play with Mike T - we’ve got two of then now - who I think said he used to be a 'Hair Hunter'. Don’t know why he’s joined us? Then there’s 'Terry All Day' (and All Night) and Triggers replacement - Mickey Pearce. Hope to get to know the other newbies soon.
Simon - Editor
Fat Boy Slim - Assistant and Trainee
PS. Followed the conversation re putting in cards. Seems to me a good compromise is Robbo does one, but the rest of you don’t!
PPS. Went to the Captains-drive In Lunch. Kim had cheesecake and then asked for custard. Takes all sorts.
PPS. Roger wrote to me asking the rules. I explained they are secretly hidden on the website under Fantasy League 2022 - how devious of me.